


What The Hell Is Happening ?

by chibimelodee



Series: What The Hell ! [1]
Category: Crimson Peak (2015), Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Attempted Murder, Bobby Singer Deals With Idjits, Bobby Singer is Carter Cushing, Crazy Lucille Sharpe, Crossover, Demon Deals, Demon Summoning, F/M, Fatherhood, Fights, First Love, Hurt Bobby Singer, Idjits, POV Bobby Singer, Past Crowley, Police Procedural, Poor Thomas, Soul Selling, Time Travel, goodbye letter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-09-27 09:02:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17159144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chibimelodee/pseuds/chibimelodee
Summary: What if Crowley did something wrong and send Bobby in the body of Sir Carter Cushing ? Will Edith still marry Thomas ? How will Bobby return to his time ?





	1. Where Am I ?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby wakes up in Carter Cushing's body. Lucille Sharpe tries to kill him.

Something was wrong. Something was definitively wrong. That pact with Crowley was supposed to heal him and yes, he was standing on his two feet. But he was also standing in a unknown shower room. A sweet, old, very old tune was being played on a phonograph. Bobby studied himself in the mirror, noticing he was in robes. He still had the same face, his beard was a little longer and God does he looked tired and thoughtful. What the hell was happening ? An attendant arrived with clean towels, making all ready for Bobby’s apparently shave. 

\- The water’s hot, just the way you like it, sir, he said as he turned on one of the showers. Would you like the same as usual ? Ham and eggs ? A bit of coffee maybe ?

\- Yeah. Do that, lad, Bobby replied trying to not look out of place. And the Times too !

\- Right away, the attendant said as he walked away.

This is weird. All seemed out of times. He needed to know where and when the bloody hell he was ! Thinking about it, he started to see that making a pact with Crowley was really, like really really a bad idea. Maybe the attendant could help him figured out what was happening.

Checking if he was alone on this room, he began to mumble unintelligible thing. He had to come back. Sam and Dean needed him ! The Apocalypse was happening !

\- CASTIEL, YOU IDJIT ! Bobby screamed. I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME ! BRING ME BACK NOW ! THE BOYS NEED ME, SO YOU BETTER BRING YOUR ANGEL ASS RIGHT NOW AND GET ME TO THEM !

He waited several minutes but nothing came. He repeated and repeated the “prayer” to this angel Dean considered like his fairy god-mother. But nothing came. Bobby had to face the truth. Crowley has been playing him all along and there’s nothing he could do about it. Well, perhaps he could if he had the right book, herbs, witch as so on. He needed to adapt.

The water running down the showers was so hot everything was foggy. In wishpering, he took the razor blade. This beard was way too long for him anyways. But how the hell could he managed to shave if he couldn’t see himself in that damn mirror ! Mist clouded his vision as he began to prepare. Then a shadow flitted behind him, startling hom and he turned to see if someone was there. But, there was no one. He could swore that someone, or something was there. The air was still hot so he knew it was no ghost.

\- Who’s there ? Castiel ? Crowley ?

The shadow appeared briefly in his vision but was gone just as fast as it was coming. His hunter’s instinct told him to be ready for whatever was coming. He quiclky hid the razor blade in his loose sleeve. He had the distinct feeling he was not alone.

Hot water was spilling over the bassin. With all his thought, he had forgotten to turn it off and he was now wading in a puddle of hot water. The soap brick fell. With a grunt, he bent to pick it up. The shadow was there again but he pretend to ignore it. Then, someone grabbed him by the cuff of his robe and the back of his head. Alas, this someone didn’t know about his hunter’s reflexes. Before his opponent could do something, Bobby took the razor blade out of his sleeve and stabbed it. Apparently, this didn’t seem to bother his enemy and Bobby’s head was slammed down against the basin’s corner. 

\- You, idjit ! You have no idea who you’re dealing with, he said between his teeth, turning to face his opponent.

\- Well, Sir Cushing, aren’t you a little difficult to kill, a female voice answered him.

Removing the blade from her left arm, the feminine form came to him but Bobby was too quick. As soon the woman, who apparently wanted his host or whatever he was dead, was on the ground, slipping on a puddle, unable to move. Bobby has no remorse killing supernatural creatures but refused to murder a mere mortal. He knocked her out with one punch, just when the attendant came by, carrying a tray with his breakfast and newspaper.

The scene was apparently too much for the young man, who dropped the tray, the china plate breaking in a million of pieces when it met the floor.

\- Don’t stay like that ! Bobby said with authority. Call someone !


	2. Who Am I ?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby finds out he has a daughter, calls Crowley and Thomas Sharpe tries to apology

Everything happened very fast and before Bobby could think straight he was dressed, a bandage around his head to stop his forehead to bleed. And there he was, sitting in a police interrogation room. When a young policeman finally arrived, Bobby glared at him, hoping he was playing his role well enough.

\- I expect this crazy woman to be punished ! Attacking a respectable man (he certainly hoped he was) like me in a shower room of a men club ! It's a shame ! 

\- Sir Cushing... 

\- Yes, it's my name, Sir Carter Cushing (luckily he had found "his" paper on his jacket) you better take care of this psycopath than interrogate me !

\- But Sir, she said it's a misunderstanding... that she came to give your check back and that you flipped on a pudde... 

\- Bullshit ! She hit me and then SHE flipped. I was just defending myself ! Who are you going to believe ? 

Bobby was really great at improvising. All his hunter years learned him that as well and by the look of the policeman, he was doing a good job. The cop clearly was uncomfortable. Rookies were really a good target.

\- Look, Bobby said with a reconforting smile, if you let me leave this room now, I will not tell your superior how you treated me. I have a lot of thinks to do and my head hurt. I have a commotion you know... 

\- F... Fine Sir... I'll forbide Lady Sharpe to come close to you... Your daughter is waiting for you in the hall... 

A daughter ? This world was freakyier than he was expecting ! He could not have a daughter ! Yes, he considered Sam and Dean his sons but a daughter ? He was not father-material and he frankly didn't know how to talk to a girl ! He couldn't imagine dealing with a young girl or even worse, a bloody teenager ! When he arrived in the hall, a blonde, almost white haired, woman ran to him and hugged him.

\- Father, you did me quite a fright ! What happened ? How are you feeling ? No way you're going to work today... You need to rest ! And... I need to talk to you...

This fragile woman should be his daughter... Strange... she didn't look like him... her big eyes stared at him with emotion and concern. She must really loved her father... she was very elegant and beautiful in her own way. 

\- Can we talk about that at home, my child ? 

Bobby had no idea what her name was... He thought that playing with his head injury was the best he could do... What sort of a father he could be if he had forgotten the name of his very own flesh and blood...

When they arrived to a big mansion he supposed to be their home, his daughter insisted for him to rest in his favorite armchair... 

\- Father, what happened ? She asked slowly

\- I tell you what happened ! A bloody lunatic came in the shower room of my club and attacked me ! That's what happened ! Luckily I was able to defend myself or she would have killed me !

\- Lady Lucille said it was a misunderstanding !... that you...

\- You know her ?

\- Of course Father... she was there last night with her brother for supper... Are you alright ? Should I call Alan ?

\- Balls ! My own daughter is trusting a psycopath instead of her own father ! Bobby whispered... I'm afraid I have some memory problem... The stroke on my head should have been stronger than I expected... 

\- Don't play like that ! You PAID them to go back to England so that Thomas could not court me anymore ! 

\- What ?! Who's the bloody hell is Thomas ? 

\- Sir Thomas Sharpe, Lucille's brother ! Are you sure you are okay ? 

Even if she had asked for his well being, Bobby knew that the young woman was mad. The way her eyes stared at him, her lips to twist at his lies... If her father truly has paid the man his daughter loved to go away, then it was understandable... But the fact he nearly died at the hand of the sister of his "daughter"'s love interest was too much... He didn't know why "he" did that but is was a pretty good idea. No way she was going to see them again ! He had to try not to get angry. He had to stay in his role.

\- I don't have to explain you why I did what I did ! You just have to know I did it for your well-being... 

\- But Father ! You made him broke my heart ! Why... 

That was enough for him... He couldn't let an innocent girl with this crazy woman ! 

\- ENOUGH you idijt ! 

\- Father, language ! 

\- Now shut the fuck up and listen to me ! This Lucille tried to kill me and you blame me for arranging her and her blasted brother to leave ! Balls ! This world is crazy ! I thought I have seen it all but I was wrong ! Now go to your room and stay there ! 

Tears started to show on the woman eyes but she refused to let them fall. She ran toward the stairs, shouting : 

\- You never spoke to me like that !

\- Boohoo, sorry your feelings hurt, Princess 

Finally alone, a bit shaken by what was just happened with his newly daughter, Bobby visited the house to find the kitchen. Maybe there, he would find some herbs and oils he could use to summon Crowley... when he finally find what he was looking for, someone knocked on the front door. A young domestic he had never seen opened and came to annonce the Barronet Thomas Sharpe. Bobby gave the lad his day before rushing to the hall where he met a handsome young man, with dark hair and pearcing blue eyes. So this was the brother... interesting... He needed to be alone. This would have to be quick.

\- Sir Cushing, I came here to apologize... My sister...

\- She tried to kill me ! Now get out of here ! You'll never see my daughter again ! OUT !

Thomas backed down. He never thought that Carter Cushing could be so... dramatic, so... violent. Sure, what Lucille has done was unforgivable but... he was not his sister... 

\- May I see Edith one last time ? The barronet asked, not looking into her father's eyes.

\- Over my dead body ! Bobby screamed before slamming the door on his shocked face.

Summoning a demon was quite simple, if you knew what do to... And, luckily for Bobby, this Carter seemed to have all he needed. Preparing the trap, he could hear Edith crying. Edith... so that was her name. He secretly hoped that this new information would be useless to him, that he would be home soon, with Dean and Sam, that the Apocalypse would be behind them... 

Instead of the familiar accountable face of Crowley, Bobby soon faced a skinny, short strange man who looked at him with big black eyes. His hand-me-down clothes were too big for him.

\- Crowley ? Bobby asked hesitantly 

\- Yes, that's my name... and who is the first one to ever summon me directly ?

\- Crowley, you son of a...

\- Bitch ? Yes she was... Witch too if you allow me to say... She was reeeeeeeeeally crazy that one ! But I suspect you didn't summon me to talk about dear old mum... And you seem to know me...

\- Don't play with me, you idjit ! Bring me back to Sam and Dean so we can stop bloody Lucifer ! 

\- The Devil is still in his cage and he is not going to go free pretty soon... what if we start with the beginning... how do you know me ?

Bobby tried to explain his best about what was happening, Crowley complicating his task by commenting every single details... After a very long hour of explication, the demon was quite shocked.

\- So, a simple crossroads-demon like me is preventing the Apocalypse with hunters ! Wow ! 

\- Bring me back now ! 

\- I can't ! I don't even know why my futur-self will do that to you... Time travel is very difficult... but enough talking, you wasted to much of my time, and time means lost souls... My boss won't be happy...

\- Don't worry about Lilith... that bitch will be dead soon enough... beside, you idjit can't go anywhere, Bobby said revealing the demon trap, coming nearer the demon with a bottle of holy water...

Outside the house, not caring about the heavy rain, Thomas stood still, hopelessly watching Edith's window. The young woman smiled sadly, waving at him...


	3. Edith's letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby wants to reconcile with Edith and makes another deal with Crowley

After torturing Crowley for a while, Bobby began to think every hopes was gone... Maybe he has to stay there, in this long-past era, living as Sir Carter Cushing with his daughter, Edith... Speaking of Edith, her cries was long gone and he couldn't hear a single sound upstairs... Maybe she had finally came in her senses. Maybe she had fallen asleep... After all, a good night could not hurt. Crowley will still be here tomorrow, thanks to the strong trap Bobby made... He poured himself a glass of whisky before sitting on the armchair and falling asleep. The morning came fast but it was Crowley’s protests that woke Bobby up.

\- Did you see a young lady ? Bobby asked without answering to whatever the demon said.

\- I refuse to stay here, you mortal ! Let me free, now !!!

A holy water-shoot made Crowley yelled.

\- I saw no-one !!!

This was really stange… She should be awake by now, hearing the clamor of the demon. With a sigh, he began to go upstairs. He wasn't feeling well enough to deal with her right now and didn’t know how to explain the presence of Crowley in the living room. He opened the first door, revealing a bedroom full of books. It was very dark, despite the opened windows… Noticing a white nightgown laying on the bed, he supposed this was Edith’s room. But she was not there… The bed was not undone, the wardrobe was wide open, some books on the floor… Were was she ? A letter was resting on desk near the biggest window… Written in a elegant cursive manner was « his » name. Tremulously, Bobby opened it.

_My dear Father,_

_I am really sorry we must separate in such way. You changed so much in so little time…_

_I am sure that Lucille has a very good explication to what happened. You just refused to hear her, just like you refused to hear Thomas’ idea._

_It breaks my heart to do it without your consent but earlier today, Thomas proposed to me. Love can be found in some strange place and I find it in someone I'm supposed to hate. Don't blame me, father, but I said Yes and now my destiny is linked to his. I’m not the kind of girl who follows her heart, but just for this time, allow me to be this girl._

_By the time you read that letter, I’m probably alrealdy married to the man I love and on my way to Allerdale Hall, his mansion in England. I’m going to live my own life, far away of every problem._

_My only hope is, that one day, you’ll forgive me and come visit._

_Yours always,_

_Your daughter,_

_Edith Cushing soon-to-be Lady Sharpe._

Bobby couldn’t believed what he was reading… This stupid little brat was gone with the brother of the woman who tried to murder him and she defended her !!! Even if he knew Edith was not his real daughter, he felt the need to do what’s right for her. He needed her to come back home before she makes the greatest mistake of her life ! He didn’t know why but he was sure it was a mistake, she was going to regret it. He felt almost betrayed by his daughter he just met. How could she be so stupid ?

His first impression of this man was not really great, he was too polite to be honest or really dumb. Coming to his home after his sister tried to kill him was a foolish thing to do… and this silly barronet still believed he could court Edith after all that ! Supernatural creatures, he could dealt with, simple human beings, it was too complicated… especially when they are brainless… He could understand that this barronet could be a complete moron, remembering the fact that « he » gave him a check to leave… This Thomas must do all that for money… But Edith… He hadn’t even thought of having a daughter one day and he had hoped that she had a brain ! But apparently, no ! Going away like Romeo and Juliet with a handsome stupid man, knowing he could be involved in his almost murder… That was insane, he couldn’t believe that !!! He had to save her from her stupidity !

\- Change of plan ! Bobby declared when he came back to the living room.

\- You set me free ? Crowley asked with a little bit of hope.

\- How about making a deal ?

\- What are you going to give me ? You already sold your soul to my futur-self and there’s nothing I want other than that…

\- What about 2 noble souls ? Sir and Lady Sharpe ? This could impress your boss and you could be promoted ! But I can see you’re not interest, so I’m going alone and let you root here…

\- Wait, wait, wait !!! You’re ready to sell me souls of innocents ? Are you sure you’re not out-of-your-mind ? You’re supposed to be the good fellow…

\- Listen, this stupid little brat who apparantly is my daughter ran away with them ! I have to get her back, I don’t care about consequences, I don’t have this luxury ! Maybe you sent me here on purpose… I don’t know… So, either you help me and bring 2 fresh souls to your boss or you stay here, sobbing like a baby !

\- How about a kiss to seal the deal ?

\- No more kiss ! You get me fooled once, not twice !!! Bloody demon ! We do it the old way, signing a damn contract with my blood should be enough, yeah ?

\- It is, but not as funny as a kiss… Crowley answered, smirking.


End file.
